![]() She encouraged me to talk to friends and family. She informed me how i could get therapists for cheap or low prices, She gave me tips on how to healthily cope with things, This entire call was about me and **** that felt good. She didn't belittle my problems, compare herself to me, or make it about her. She offered help when i asked or paused and let me cry when i needed to. She told me that I had no reason to be sorry a lot.Ī great amount of time was spent with Ashley just listening to me.Īnd let me just say, speaking freely without worrying about being judged is amazing. I said sorry to ashley a lot for everything i did wrong.įor calling about my minuscule problems, for crying, for not being able to hear her, for crying again, for cursing. I told ashley that i think i was losing a best friend. I told ashley that i want to hurt and **** myself. I still curse the first couple minutes of the call that consisted of me just saying “huh?” At all her questions because I couldn’t hear (thanks dad for the horrible ears) I like to believe she greeted me with a comforting smile. I talked with my eyes closed, trying to picture her in front of me. I’d continue to live like nothing's wrong.Īnd i was connected with a soft-spoken lady called Ashley. Maybe if i kept them locked in there usual box, Maybe if i didn't say my feelings out loud, they wouldn't exist? I'm just another suicidal girl in their phonebook.Īt 5 am. My heart pounded as the automated voice greeted me. If you ever smashed my heart into little piecesĪll the delightfulness in you Don dried up and died, Never settled for less, I know you need more,Īll these mood swings I never seen before,īeautiful honest woman's what I took you for, Gunshot to my head I feel so stretched out,
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